Chapter 16 The New World

Voice of the Ego and Voice of the True Self

Ego Traits                                              True Self Traits

Flatters                                                 Informs
Commands                                           Suggests
Tests                                                     Guides
Chooses for you                                    Leaves choice to you
Imprisons                                              Empowers
Promotes dependence                          Promotes independence
Intrudes                                                 Respects
Pushes                                                  Supports
Excludes                                               Includes
Instills fear                                            Promotes well-being
Becomes bored easily, not at peace    Realizes peace when doing nothing
Is status oriented                                  Is free and open
Judges                                                  Accepts individuality
Demands obedience                             Encourages growth and development
Implies having ultimate authority        Recognizes a Higher Power
Offers shortcuts                                    Offers integration
Seeks personal gratification                Extends unconditional love

The idea of having an “ego observing practice” as a form of an examination of conscious, I feel, is not only very beneficial but necessary for spiritual growth over a long run. During my mid-thirties, I went through a period of introspection which would probably fall into this category. I found it very useful in learning to know myself, and making the changes that were necessary to live a fuller life. Since I am a person who is intuitive-feeling in accordance with the Myers-Briggs personality scale, the feelings generated from my response to life’s situations were often used as a gauge to discern whether the approach I used was leading to a greater sense of wholeness and well-being, or whether it was leading to a diminishment in the person I wanted to be.

Barbara Whitfield's chart (above) from her article in the book “Kundalini Rising” provides an excellent reference to what we can expect as we move away from the isolation, alienation and selfishness we experience from excessive ego involvement to that sense of oneness with others, the experience of community, and selflessness in service and commitment to the greater cause. The healing of my emotional pain, at that time, was taking place through the normal routes of remembering, forgiving, modifying self-concepts, resetting values and all of the other hard and tedious work that accompanies the journey through the shadow of the ego.

But the rising of Kundalini in my late fifties was an entirely different process. Phillip St. Romain, in his book “Kundalini Energy and Christian Spirituality” expresses it so perfectly.

“In attempting to understand the relationship between the kundalini process and the non-egoic state that resulted from it, I have come to believe that a thorough transformation of the unconscious has been accomplished. No matter how hard I look, I cannot find a trace of emotional pain concerning my past. This amazes me more than anyone else for as a therapist I am aware of how very little clinical work I did to arrive in this state.”

Remarkable, it is as if we become a witness to our own transformation, as the wisdom of kundalini makes its journey through the subtle body, making all the changes that are necessary to dismantle the constructs, boundaries, self-defense mechanisms, and conditioning caused by past life experiences (even the ones we are not consciously aware of) to place us squarely into that new space of the true self. Even though our awareness of past events is still all in tact, the affective memories or emotional connections with them are mysteriously gone, and as a result, those events no longer have a hold on us as they did before. The landscape of our world has changed, which is confusing because of its lack of familiarity, but liberating because, at last, one feels free from the prisons of their old false self.

My discipline now is only to maintain a healthy physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual lifestyle which is conducive for the flow of kundalini which continues relentlessly and faithfully to do its work.